i wish you knew, i really do.

i know you said you didn't have time for a relationship now, but i can't keep on fighting how i feel. you're the one person i care for most, and to pretend i don't care means to not care about anything at all. i really wish you knew just how much you meant, i wish you weren't so clueless. so many times i've wanted to tell you everything, 100%, but i've never had the opportunity to. i want to be able to see you infront of me, to be able to read your facial expression and your body language. i don't want you to runaway, pretend or lie, like you can through the phone or online. i don't want to freak you out.

there's nothing i can do to erase the memories. i can’t ignore you, nor can i forget you. i can’t stop thinking about you, and i can’t stop missing you. no matter how different things may feel between us now, or the lack of communication we've been having lately. no matter how much time that passes by, and no matter what the distance is between us, i fear that how i feel towards you will never change. i fear that none of this will ever change. i'm scared of what i'm feeling, and how strong it is.