i'm so stupid.

i miss how we used to be; i miss the late talks, i miss the jokes, i miss just talking to you. as time passes us by, it's like we talk less and less. only communicating when you feel like it, it's really unfair on me.

i sit here, thinking about you, whilst you're chatting to other chicks. i don't care if you don't feel the same way they do about you, but the way you act seems to be different. i admit, i'm jealous of the attention they get from you, cause i only get the attention when no one's around.

i honestly sit here, and wonder why i still hold on. then i remember all the memories that i've had with you; i remember our talks, i remember the way you make me smile, i remember the way you make me laugh. so many times, i've tried to leave you behind, because a lot of the times it's like we're going no where - things look up for a day or two, then you just shut me out, and i'm all down. the number of times i've tried and failed. i blame you.

why do you make me feel so happy, even after a week of no talking? i try to be angry with you, but the minute you say 'hey' i smile. i'm so vulnerable when it comes to you, sometimes i just wish i could forget everything; but that'd be forgetting happiness.. see what you have done to me?

i'm sick of putting myself out there for you, i'm sick of always being the one trying. i feel like an idiot, putting in all the effort and barely achieving anything.. make up your mind, please stop wasting my time.